Classic Pick Up Lines

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THE WRITTEN ABSURD
Bad Pick Up Lines on Swenson Funnies

It's amazing that at one time some fool may have used the following pick up lines on a woman. Over time these pick up lines have become jokes, the last laugh on a slick dude who thought he was being clever.
These pick up lines have been passed around ad infinitum through email and website postings. If you are new to pick up lines I recommend trying these out on the hottest babe you see the next time you go to a bar. Then save up some money for an escort service because that's the only way you're going to get a date.

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	You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
	If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard.
	I'm bigger and better than the Titanic. Only 200 woman went down on the Titanic.
	Want to see my Hard Drive? I promise it ain't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.

	Hi, my name is Doug. That's "god" spelled backwards with a little bit of you wrapped up in it.
	Do you work for UPS? I could've sworn I saw you checking out my package.
	Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number. Could I borrow yours?
	Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.

	Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!
	Are you accepting applications for your fan club?
	Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the "Fine Body Investigators," and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.
	You remind me of Pokemon. I just wanna Pikachu.

	Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.
	You must be an adverb, because you sure modify me!
	Did you invite all of these people? I thought it was just going to be the two of us?
	Do you have a map? I just got lost in your eyes.

	Do you believe in the hereafter? Good! Then you know what I'm here after.
	You make my software turn to hardware.
	There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.
	What's wrong? You look a little sad and gloomy. What you need is some vitamin me.

I'll add more pickup lines as I come across them.
If you have a favorite line feel free to email me.

	Don't worry every one loves cottage cheese... submitted via email
	You know six beers ago you were fucking ugly. submitted via email

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